Dear Your Majesty the Queen

I need to speak to you urgently about my brother Luke.  He’s got cancer and the doctors in Australia are being really slack.  If I could borrow your top doctor for a few days I know he/she would fix things up in no time.  Of course, Mum and Dad would pay his/her fares even if it meant selling the car or getting a loan.  Please contact me at the above address urgently.

Yours sincerely

Colin Mudford

P.S. This is not a hoax.  Ring the above number and Aunty Iris will tell you.  Hang up if a man answers.

Based on the book by Morris Gleitzman